Then, on my drive home, I remembered that I didn’t finish my rosary this morning. I felt myself calming down as I worked my way through the last four mysteries. It was like someone was hugging me, holding me, comforting me. There’s no doubt in my mind who that was. My head was in her lap just as completely as Toddler-tron’s head was in mine earlier this afternoon (right before I noticed the molar – feeling a bit guilty for wanting to strangle her).
Part of me wants to be pretty sure she didn’t have days like this. But then, I don’t know. Could it be that days like this are just part of the human condition? Could it be that Screwtape and his band of tempters are hard at work to make perfectly good days look like days like this, just to get us to slip up, maybe strangle our kid (oh, I came so close!) or yell at our spouse or take a step back away from God? And you know, once you’ve taken that first step, however small, what’s another one? And really, who needs God and all his restrictions anyway? Who needs the laws and the parameters and all that hooey?
Days like this are a big flashing neon reminder to me that I do! Say what you will about recited prayers; nothing but a good long hug from Mom would have made anything better at that point in my day. My mind was skittering from worry to worry, and there was no slowing it down and reasoning with it, until Mother Mary started stroking my temple.
Yes, Mary had days like this. Don’t we all?