What is it about the onset of REALLY COLD weather that makes me want to paint my toenails? What is it about the post-holidays freezing spell that sparks a desire to build a snowman – out of packing material if needed? What is it about January that makes me want to curl up and escape in front of the woodstove, even as I have the competing, and equally as strong, desire to go out and DO something?
I thought at first that the bright red cast might have something to do with it. It is, after all, waterproof. (That refers to the special liner. Way cool, and not something they usually do in the winter.) And it is, of course, BRIGHT red – the kind of red that inspires memories of Buckeye football games and that makes you want to wear a tank top (but only if you’re near the stove).
Maybe it has to do with the sunshine that has filled the last few days. It streams out of the heavens with a light show first thing in the morning, and then just goes all day long. And the days are getting longer! I feel every minute of it soaking into me, filling me up with hope and ambition.
Or could it be the birth of all the lambs? I haven’t had the chance I’d like to visit them all, due to the restrictions of energy thanks to the bright red cast, but I know they’re there. It won’t be long before they are old enough to come over to our barn from the other farm. The lambs never fail to make me smile or make me feel kind of tingly inside. They’re so CUTE, and when they’re older, they’re so ENERGETIC. Now that I’m a mother, they make me want more children. Seem silly, doesn’t it, that a lamb would make me want more children? (Though you will recall that Toddler-tron just turned two.) Maybe it’s the feeling that life is packed, full of good things, that I get standing there entranced by the lambs. Maybe it’s the ewes, who usually transform from pretty friendly, pretty laid-back animals to ferocious die-to-protect-my-young mothers.
Perhaps it’s the books that are stacked up everywhere in my house, inviting me to just try them out, give them a shot of my time. The bookshelf has long been packed full, so the library books are on the desk, as are the new books from Christmas. There’s one on the coffee table and two by my bed and one in my bag for work (as if I’ll have time to read – but I DO have a doctor’s appointment today…). (There would be one in the bathroom and at least one in the kitchen, but I’ve been trying to consolidate.)
Whatever it is, I feel my cup brimming over. I sit here, trying to type without moving my left arm (because I HAVE been overdoing it), and the bright red cast catches the light and starts a whole new wave of that strange desire to have bright toenails. Whatever the cause of this January soup of feelings, I will just pause and say thanks to the Guy Upstairs.